Grandma's purple blanket

(Pepper)

So, my mom has this purple blanket that she knitted out of the softest yarn ever. It is the best and everyone loves to snuggle up into it, especially the girls. Almost as soon as it touches their skin they start to get heavy eyed and they will stay asleep for hours as long as they are rapped up in it. They love it so much that they snuggle up into it bringing it over their faces and gripping it with their hands and toes. Sometimes their toes even stick through the weaves, so you see this lump of purple blanket and then baby toes sticking out of the side. (So cute!)

The only downside to the blanket is, sometimes the "fluff" from the yarn comes off.

I find it in their toes and fingers all the time!

The other day Cory was playing with Pepper and he noticed some "purple fluff" in her toes. As he pulled it out he turned to me and said, "So, I see Pepper was snuggling in the blanket today."

Yes, she sure was!

Four months

We are four months!

Can you believe it?

It seems like in the last month the girls have really grown out of the "Newborn" stage and are finally babies. They follow us better and interact with us so much better now. They also have found their hands, which I love to watch. They are still a lot of work, but it seems like they are becoming so much more fun.

Izzy

Oh, Izzy! I love her so much. She is still my cute "little" girl and we still are having a hard time getting her to eat, but she is putting on good weight. As of today she is 11.9 lbs. Good going Izzy! Although we are still doing our tummy time and even practice our sitting, Izzy loves to stand up! She does not try walking yet, just loves to stand on your legs, the floor, the bed, anything you will let her stand on. I'm sure that she will be the first to walk! It is almost like she can't wait to get going and experimenting (aka, tear the house apart) so she can learn everything.

She is becoming a thumb sucker. In fact, she is starting to bring everything to her mouth. Just the other day I put her binki in her hand and she put it right in her mouth!, all by herself! I can't believe they are growing up so fast. It makes me so sad. Slow down!!

Her new thing is sticking out her tongue. Oh, she is so cute! I could just eat her up! She smiles all the time now and has even laughed a few times. She is such a happy baby. When Cory and I took them up to Joe City, she sat with a group of people at one of the tables they had there and laughed, smiled, and entertained them for a hour or two. What a social butterfly. She has even started to talk, not really, just ga ga's and goo goo's.

Izzy, you are such a good girl! I love you so much and I am thankful everyday that you are my daughter.

Pepper

I love her so much! Pepper is also doing really good. She weights 14.2lbs today. She is such a little chubby girl and I love it. Why is it that this is the only time in a girls life where they can have rolls and it be cute? I say bring them on! She is still my big eater, and I think I can count on one hand the times she has not finished her bottle. She is so funny about it too. It is like a work out for her when she eats! She sucks so hard and so fast that she has to stop every few minutes or so and breath. She will huff and puff for a few seconds and attack the bottle again.

She loves tummy time and now whenever we put her down for it she get up on her elbows and looks around at everything. She is so funny. She crosses her little hands and looks all prissy about it, like she is all that and a bag of wigs. Oh, she makes me laugh.

She is such a big talker. She talks cute, loud, learns, yells, and even sighs. (Like I embarrass her already or something) I swear she has said mum, daddy, i love you, hungry, and ninja. I know she is so smart and is going to love ninjas or something. Although I can't wait for them to talk, I think I can wait. I think we are going to have some chatter boxes on our hands. I'll be sure to post their "twin" conversations.

How did I get so lucky to have such a wonderful little girl? I love you, Pepper.

This has been the best four months of my life! I can't wait to see what comes next.

OMG, We made it!!!

So, Cory and I decided to take the girls on their very first car trip.

(Izzy)

(Pepper)

I know, what were we thinking?

I spent the day before packing, and packing the day of, (babies have a lot of stuff!) and we left 45 minutes late!

It gets better,

We went up state about a 4 hour drive, and when we set off I didn't know if we were going to make it. The girls cried for the first hour, and feedings and changing diapers is not easy when you travel, but we did make it! When we finally got there Pepper cried, . . . LOUD!!! . . . .for an hour. Cory and I had no clue what was wrong, and she didn't want to eat!!! K, if you know Pepper you know that there is one thing that Pepper knows how to do almost as good as her mommy and that is, eat. So, I did the only thing that I knew would work . . . I got her blanket and swaddled her as tight as I could. She fell asleep five minutes later.

Only after we had put them down for the night did we realise she had been asleep during the time we drove up to the top of the rim and have not popped her ears. I would be crying too. Poor thing. :(

I did not pack their baby bath tub, I figured I could just give them a bath in the tub there. They loved it! I splashed the water up on them and they squealed in delight. And putting them down was easy. I had no clue how they were going to sleep, and they truly surprised me.

(Izzy and Pepper at night)

(morning)

They really didn't bother each other much either.

On the ride home they slept almost the whole time. (Thank goodness) And when we got home I think I finally took my first breath.

OMG, we made it, and for now that is all I can ask for.

Sleeping habits

I have been very lucky to have girls that sleep through the night. They really didn't take too long to teach them to sleep well either. At 9pm I get their milk ready and take turns putting each one down. They fall asleep around 9:30 and 10:00 and then don't wake back up until 5:30 and 6:00. I know! I am so lucky!

This morning after their first feeding of the day, I put them back down and then got myself ready for the day. I came back in to find this:

Izzy sleeps on her back with her hands up by her face just like her daddy. She is so precious and I always want to kiss her hands when she opens them up like that. She kicks her blanket off and sometimes can move from one side of the crib to the other. To most people she sleeps "normal".

Pepper on the other hand,

sleeps just like her momma. I know to some people, it does not look comfortable, but really I understand her.

Longing

To my friends, I love you.

Over the past few weeks I have had many of my close friends share with me their desire to have children and their hardship of that either not being able to come true or it being very difficult for them to have children. I feel for them. I want so badly to change things for them and make it better, different, joyful, peaceful, whatever it is that they need. I wish that things were easier for them.

I wish that I knew what to say to make them feel better. Sometimes when they say things that brake my heart I am lost for words. I don't want to say or do the wrong thing and make things worst, but I want to help how I can. Sometimes the only thing I can say is: I'm sorry.

I am so sorry.

I want so badly for you to be happy. I want you to have what you want, and I hope that you will. Maybe not now, maybe not here, but someday you will be a mom. You will be a mom to a beautiful little child. One that is waiting for you. Now you just have to wait for them.

I love you, please hold on.

Sisters

Don't worry everyone. I will do a blog about Pepper, but this isn't it.

This blog is about sisters.

Sometimes I wonder where I would be if I didn't have my sisters. Disneyland wouldn't be as much fun, and I wouldn't know as much about coyotes as I do. I would have no one to walk around the zoo with and there would be too much ice cream in the fridge. Sometimes us girls just need a girl friend who we can share our up most secrets with that wont ever judge us and will love us no matter what. Sisters can be the best for that, and I know that if I didn't have my sisters not only would I not be who I am today, but life just wouldn't be as fun.

Sometimes I sit and think about how my girls will play with each other when they are older. Will they have tea parties together and talk in their own language? Will they fight to be the first at everything? Will they hold hands as they walk to nursery and class? Will they pretend to be one another for people who don't know them as well? Will they share clothes and shoes, or have different looks? I don't know, but what I do know is, they will have a sister.

Even now, when they are still so young and don't even understand, I think they know they have a sister. I find them all the time holding hands. When I do put them to sleep together they turn towards one another to snuggle up to their sister. It is so sweet to see and I hope that it never stops. They are beginning to talk right now and sometimes we sit them up facing each other. They ga ga and goo goo to one another, like they really understand what the other is saying. Sometimes they even smile at one another. It is so fun to watch.

I am so lucky to have such wonderful little girls. And I am so grateful that they will always have their sister.